


Tick-Tock

by DollyPop



Category: Soul Eater
Genre: Bachelor Party, Brotp, Drunk Spirit, Drunkenness, F/M, Gen, Kesha - Freeform, Marriage, Platonic SteinSpirit, SteinMarie Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-10
Updated: 2015-11-10
Packaged: 2018-04-30 22:03:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5181299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DollyPop/pseuds/DollyPop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spirit was sobbing in the bathtub. Again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tick-Tock

Spirit was sobbing in the bathtub. Again. The song played once more, looping, as it was the only track in the playlist, and Ke$ha echoed out in Stein’s bathroom, a repetitive, upbeat tune only punctuated by the Death Scythe’s gargling of tequila.

Stein couldn’t help but feel that he had lived out the exact scenario in the past, sitting atop a closed toilet lid whilst his best friend sobbed into a bottle about how he wasn’t ready. Only problem was, this time, it wasn’t Spirit’s wedding the man was bawling about, his calls of “You’re all grown up!” and “My little Meister,” all particularly eloquent with drunken slurring, though the pride was clearly there. 

“You’re going to get alcohol poisoning,” Stein said, not even lifting a brow. Sid had already passed out on the monstrous purple couch Marie’d dragged in ages ago, and he hoped to death he wouldn’t have to clean vomit off of the upholstery. At the very least, Sid knew how to hold his scotch, which couldn’t really be said for Spirit, hence why the man had settling into the bathtub, instead, stripped to his heart-patterned boxers and crooning softly to the ever-appropriate lyrics of “Tick Tock”. 

Stein breathed in hard through his nose, taking his glasses off and cleaning them on his stitched up shirt, only turning to Spirit when the man started giggling and singing along.

_“I’m talking about everybody getting drunk, drunk. Boys tryin’ to touch my junk, junk. Gonna smack him if he getting too drunk, drunk.”_

Stein suspected that Spirit already had some acute form of alcohol poisoning, and the urge to see the detrimental effects drinking in such excess could produce in real time was more than apparent, but Stein’s twitching fingers only carded through his prematurely gray hair after he put his glasses back on.

Some Bachelor Party. He'd absolutely refused to leave his lab under grounds that Spirit would likely take him to Chupa Cabra's and, frankly, considering the fact that Stein was engaged to Marie " _T_ _he Pulverizer"_ Mjolnir, he assumed it wouldn't go well if she found out that, the night before their marriage, he would be dragged to a bar/escort service because of his best friend.

Stein really wanted to keep his life, as well as his testicles, intact for his wedding. So, they decided to stay in.

He knew if he looked at any clock, he’d get the information that it was three am. 

Death, he’d never hear the end of it if he showed up late to his own wedding to Marie, all because his best man was drunk all night, and then hungover the next morning. He was already going to be throttled by Azusa for having the audacity to rip up his suit.

Marie certainly wasn’t marrying him for his fashion sense, so he didn’t know why Queen of the Committee Chairman was so worked up about it all.

“Senpai,” Stein began, leaning over and settling his elbows on his knees, but he was cut off.

“Smack him, Stein. I’ll smack ‘im if he getting too drunk,” Spirit broke in, swaying in the bathtub.

If Spirit used the mirror to call Death up to have a twenty-minute-long discussion about underpants,  _again_ , Stein was just going to drug him and call it a day. He wasn’t interested in leaving Spirit unsupervised for any period of time, however, and to steal away to his medical cabinet, that would be necessary, and he feared for the good of his home if he left Spirit by himself. 

He didn’t feel like carrying the man out. Especially when he was drunk and all his limbs turned into vice grips. All he’d feel comfortable doing was dragging him. 

And though his floors could use some cleaning, he takes it that Spirit wouldn’t be too kind to the fact that he would turn into a human mop.

“Senpai,  _you’re_  drunk,” Stein claimed, helpfully.

However, when Spirit turned to him, his eyes were wide and he glanced from the bottle he was clutching to Stein, an incredulous look on his face. 

When he spoke, it was a whisper.

“Does that mean  _I_  have to be smacked?”

“Every day of your life,” Stein answered, simply heaving a sigh and standing from the toilet. Spirit could handle a little dust. When he was certain that there were no signs of immediate upchucking, Stein decided that he could at least dump Spirit atop Sid and then retire to his lab in order to wait out the few final hours of being a bachelor before his wedding, which was scheduled to take place in approximately eight hours.

When Stein’s hands came under Spirit’s arms, the man squirmed uncomfortably, and offered no help in getting himself out of the tub.

Definitely drunk, then. He should know better than to be compromised around Stein, after what happened all those years ago. When Stein glanced at Spirit’s chest, he could still make out the incision lines.

It was a slow process to get Spirit to what Marie had designated as the “living room”, only fit for living after she brought in actual furniture.

He hadn’t needed to invite anyone over, before she came back from Oceania. No one would ever be comfortable enough if he was on his own. They must have assumed he’d softened after living with her. The last time Spirit came of his own volition, it had been when they were still partners. Seeing him the night before his own wedding to Maka’s mother was only arranged when Spirit called him, four sheets to the wind, yammering about how he was scared.

Now, dragging Spirit to the couch Stein’s soon-to-be wife dragged in, it felt almost surreal.

“’m so proud,” Spirit murmured as the two of them made their way through the lab, only knocking over four plants as opposed to all of them. Stein commended his own grace.

“Hm?” he asked, not paying too much attention.

“You won’t fuck up…like I did,” Spirit added, his voice trailing off, and when Stein stopped, looking down at the man who was slumped in his arms, he noticed that he was passed out. Stein sighed through his nose, closing his eyes momentarily and adjusting his hold, making sure that Spirit was adequately supported.

Perhaps laying him on the opposite couch would be kinder than shoving him onto Sid.

The pillow and hangover pills, though?

Now that was proof that he’d definitely softened.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for an ask-meme over on tumblr! "Things you said when you were drunk"


End file.
